By: Katie

Katie — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 01:59:02 +0000

Thank you so much, ladies! I’m so glad that I’m not the only one who has felt like this over the years. I have 2 children: my oldest is going into the 3rd grade and my youngest is going into full day Kindergarten this upcoming school year. I have battled with this over the past 8 years as a SAHM. I completed my degree while still pregnant with my first child and 3 mos. later I gave birth to my daughter.
Prior to completing my degree, I had always envisioned having a successful career, driving the fancy car and being that independent, empowered career woman. Once I had my daughter and felt how precious and important being with her was, I made the choice to be home with her while my husband was the main breadwinner. It’s been a long and difficult path. Because my husband is in the Army, we’ve lived in 6 different states in the past 8 years. I’ve had to uproot and replant our family at least every 2 years. Making new friends, finding good schools, finding a nice home to live in, etc. has all been very difficult to do with 2 children. Because we’ve lived away from family, we’ve had very little support. I’m so thankful to know that I’m not the only one who has gone through the roller coaster of emotions. I remember thinking when i would be alone with my children when they were babies and my husband was away for some military training, I would think how can I do this? How can I tolerate the incessant whining, the endless poopy diapers, their neediness….I would think….what did I do with my life? How did I get here? The time has finally come for my youngest to go to school. I’m having the hardest time in my life with letting go. I’ve had precious times with my children and I’ve had a lot of difficult times. Through those difficult times, it has made me stronger and has developed my character. It’s the type of work where you really learn about your strengths and weaknesses. If I’ve made a career out of staying home and raising my children, I’ve learned valuable life skills of survival and if that’s the case then I haven’t gone wrong. My decision was the right one. My kids will look back and say, “My mom was there…she may have been a little cuckoo but she was there.” I’m not sure if I lost myself along the way or if I appear ungrounded to others but one thing is for sure, there is a time and place for everything in life. These past 8 years have been for my children and will continue to be. Now that they will both be in school, it’s time for me to get a part of myself back. There’s nothing wrong with that. Thank you so much to all of the ladies out there who can admit the truth!

By: I’m at Simple Mom today

I’m at Simple Mom today — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 11:11:03 +0000

[...] week I shared about the choices we make in our lives. Today, over at Simple Mom, I wrote a bit more about when we say yes, but [...]

By: MJ

MJ — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 04:29:26 +0000

That’s a really good point to make. One which many women won’t admit – there is a lot of pressure to be a super mom andr the whole “grieving” thing for your past life is not given much air time. I felt there must be something wrong with me. I really wanted children but when our first came I struggled as you did and felt very isolated, it is a huge transition of roles that few of us are actually prepared for. Having said that I enjoyed it enourmously now, although it would be nice to have a quiet coffee or a day spa treatment again one day!!

Comments on: Good, Better, Yes and No

By: Katie

By: I’m at Simple Mom today

By: MJ