Photo by Frank Jakobi

Winter can be a time when we are tough on ourselves.  The months of deficient sunlight, lack of fresh air and grey days put a strain on our body and mind. Many of us live in areas that local fresh fruits and vegetables are not available, so our nutrition suffers.  The holiday season is often laced with exhaustion, anxiety over social engagements and financial constrictions.   

It is easy to see how negativity and self condemnation can have a stronghold on our inner thoughts during these months.  

Most of us have trouble loving our body.  We have grown up with an onslaught of media images that airbrush models and celebrities into unrealistic figures…ones that we hold ourselves in comparison to.   On a daily basis, we talk to ourselves in ways we would never speak to another.

Imagine speaking to a child the way you speak to yourself about your body. It would devastate and squelch a child. It affects you similarly, causing stress and emotional pain in your body, which can make improving your health or losing weight even more difficult. 

Who would you be and what could you accomplish if your valuable resources weren’t used this way?

The body you have right now is incredible! It never misses a heartbeat, it maintains homeostasis and it miraculously digests whatever you put in it. It is your instrument for expressing your creativity, intelligence and love. Your mind is brilliant!  It manages millions of chemical interactions daily, processing a constant flood of information, making sense of complex things, building connections, keeping you alert, safe and growing without rest.    Your spirit is infinite!  It leads you to truth.  It is the mark of the Divine about you and is precious beyond words. 

By focusing on the 1% you don’t like or wish was different, you may be ignoring the remaining 99% about yourself that is beautiful, unique and delightful.  That 1% negativity acts like a drop of dye in a gallon of water– it thoroughly contaminates the whole thing.

Some days I feel like I am on the brink of overwhelm.  Life with two very little ones leaves me putting out one fire after another.  I often feel harried and torn with their needs competing with my own.   And on and on my day seems to snowball at times.  Do you relate?

Yesterday was one of those days for me.  In the evening as I was rocking my littlest to sleep, I reflected on where my mind goes so often lately.  To grumbling, complaining, dissatisfaction, blaming.  I deeply believe that we need to guard our thoughts and minds from chronic and damaging negativity.  

Happy, joyful, grateful and contented people were not born that way-they have made a decision to train their thoughts toward a higher place. 

What would your life be like if you were simply at peace with the body you have? 

What would it be like if you trained your mind to produce life-giving, loving, gentle and kind thoughts TO YOURSELF as well as others?

You may wish to make your body healthier and stronger, but could you do that out of love and respect for your body instead of the opposite? Could you begin to treat yourself with kindness, to limit the negative self-talk and to reconnect with your inner wisdom?

Take a minute to imagine what that would feel like.

It would mean celebrating your body rather than punishing it. It would mean nourishing your body rather than depriving it. It would mean a chance to watch yourself flourish just like a child flourishes when treated with care and respect.  It would mean spending a day in enjoyable, loving thoughts that overflowed effortlessly to those around you.

Here is my game plan

It’s important to set up ways to stay checked in with yourself so you can be aware when something starts to go astray or feel imbalanced. Now that I am aware of the negativity that has crept in,  I’m setting out to commit the next 30 days to recreating habits of mind and thought that will build me up instead of tear me down. 

Wanna join me?  I brainstormed a simple plan to help me along the way.  Your supports may be different than my supports.  Take a moment to consider what would help you.  Preparing for success has always served me well…so here are the supports I am going to use. 

1.  Commit this to prayer everyday. If even it is a 30 second request, I want to bring this to the Lord in prayer for His guidance and help.

2.  Watch my words.  I remember reading in the news a while about about a church and their 21 day challenge to refrain from complaining, sarcasm and criticism of any sort.  They used a bracelet to help them stay accountable– whenever they slipped , the bracelet was transferred to the other wrist.  Their goal was to make it 21 straight days on the same hand.  For some people it took them 2 months, others 7 months to complete the challenge– but many lives felt transformed from it.   This is something that I know would likely work for me– I’m a visual, concrete kinda gal.  I am going to order myself a plastic bracelet from here with words that work for me.

3.  Guard my thoughts.  This one is going to be harder to work on, since many times the thoughts flow through my mind without a warning.  I am going to try to become more mindful of when they begin to surface by countering them as soon as I recognize it.   I plan to write on small index cards some short verses of scripture or quotes that will realign my thinking.  I’m hoping by consistently replacing good for the bad, the negativity will lessen.

4.  Count my blessings.  We know that gratitude is the framework for a rich and deeply satisfying life.  Being intentional about what you are grateful for spurs you on to more gratitiude.  When I write down things everyday that I am grateful for, I start to see blessings all around me.  So I will start my gratitude journal again. 

Some clarifications:  I’m not trying to be Pollyanna here.  I don’t want to hide my *true* feelings and thoughts under a fake “I’m so happy” banner.  I think it is OK to feel overwhelmed, angry, upset, sad, down, tired or frustrated.  It is how I respond to those legitimate feelings.  Can I simply be tired without becoming short or sarcastic with my husband?  Can I feel overwhelmed and choose to slow down instead of attacking myself and how competent I am as a parent?…you get the idea.

Let me know what your thoughts are and if this challenge resonates true for you too.  What would support you to succeed at retraining your mind away from negativity?  I look forward to hearing from you.